By Marilyn Cramer, RMT, Cl.Ht.
Forgiveness, or lack of it has a tremendous impact on our well-being and health. For the last 14 years I have been practicing Reiki and Somatic Healing, and I’ve seen many clients who couldn’t forgive himself or herself, a friend, or a family member for an overt act or an act of unkindness. My clients are the ones who become ill or diseased, and have chronic pain or depression from unforgiveness – they’re the ones who suffer.
Forgiving yourself is probably one of the most difficult tasks. I think it’s easier to forgive others. Everything that’s in the past is over, and there’s nothing we can do about it. It doesn’t help us physically, mentally or emotionally to dwell on past events and the ways we would have changed them if we had the opportunity to do it over again.
If you can look at life as though we’re all in a University, and we’re living this life to learn and to grow, we also are here to learn from our past experiences. You can view that experience as a valuable lesson – as an opportunity for learning, and let go of it. It took me awhile to let go of my past mistakes, but I did it. It may or may not take awhile to really let go and have self-forgiveness. Forgive yourself, and release the negative energy. Just let it go…
One of my clients had a very difficult time forgiving herself for the mistakes she thought she made with a past relationship. She mulled it over and over again in her mind, always wishing she had said and done something different. She thought she should have… or she could have… you get the picture – we’ve all tortured ourselves in this manner at one time or another. As a result, she was very depressed, she had aches & pains everywhere (she was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia) and she had low self-esteem. When she finally let it go and truly forgave herself, her depression lifted. She became happier and more energetic, and the aches and pains disappeared.
Be free of the past. Live in the NOW. Live, and learn. It’s that simple if you decide to let go. Set your intentions now, and forgive yourself for everything that you think needs forgiving. Choose to let it hold you back no longer. Practice forgiveness, and you’ll free your spirit to live positively each day, unburdened by your past “learning opportunities”.
If you carry a grudge for a long time and finally let it go, it brings a real sense of relief when you decide to forgive. This freedom of forgiveness is cleansing and refreshing. Forgiveness lightens your load and refreshes your soul. Forgiveness helps you to move forward in a positive direction. It’s like removing an obstacle or a heavy burden. Forgiveness not only heals our physical, mental & emotional bodies, but it heals the soul.
You don’t have to forgive the act – just the person. If you can forgive the person for being human with human frailties, then YOU can heal. If you live with unforgiveness, it will eventually manifest in your body as dis-ease or disease. Forgiving someone does not mean you have to trust them – it simply means moving on. Forgiveness does not mean you’ll be more vulnerable, and it doesn’t mean that what happened is acceptable. It just means you are letting it go – finally.
Another client had chronic low back pain. She was really upset over an incident with a friend that happened many years ago, and she never forgave her. She never saw her friend again. Once she was able to forgive her friend for being human (remember, she didn’t have to forgive the act), her chronic pain subsided.
When you have been hurt, there is absolutely nothing to be gained by passing the pain on to another person. By forgiving another person for whatever has been done, you are choosing to no longer let those past actions hold you back. It’s all about choice. You can either hold a grudge and let it ruin your relationship and your life/health, or you can let go of the resentment and let your relationship and/or your health heal. Even if you never want to see or to speak to that person again for the rest of your life, you can let the negative energy of unforgiveness release – and be released from its grip.
When you hold onto the past and you don’t allow forgiveness, you are allowing yourself to be the victim. Choosing to be the victim can create havoc in your body, and in your spiritual growth. We cannot grow spiritually if we hold on to past grudges. When you let it go, you can get on with your life. When you let it go, your body can begin the healing process. The chronic pain some of my clients experienced actually disappeared after they had true forgiveness in their hearts.
I’ve found that when I really soul searched, I found little things that I needed to forgive. I needed to forgive my stepson & stepdaughter for things that they said and did when I first came into their lives. When I realized that I was unforgiving and held resentment, I was able to let it go. My perception of them changed and as a result, my heart opened toward them. I felt like a weight lifted off my chest and my body, and I was lighter and I felt a shift in consciousness. The burden of resentment was freed and healed. When I had true forgiveness in my heart, our relationship became very different, and we truly felt love for each other. We became respectful of each other… and caring. I didn’t even tell them how I felt or that I had to forgive them – everything just changed for the better. The Universe works in wonderful ways when we have true forgiveness and love in our hearts.
Forgiving another and/or yourself for being human helps your spirit to soar, and you’ll be unburdened by the past mistakes of others and yourself. It allows the energy to flow in a positive manner, and it allows the opportunity to heal your relationships and yourself.
I hope this meditation is helpful, and if you ever have any questions, please feel free to send me an email at Marilyn@LightHealer.net
Marilyn Cramer is a Medical Intuitive, Reiki Master Teacher, Somatic Healer, Mental Coach, Thought Field Therapist, Angel Communicator, writer & editor.